Hi again. This is another one of my thoughts and i wanted to share it with you guys. This is about one of my childhood stories.

Back during Year 2 of my Primary School years, I was advised that i should make some friends. I didn't really have any interest and i only made one friend. I didn't even get the chance to go out with my friends or walk home from School with them because of my Autism. It felt like i wanted to make more friends so we could play more, but no. They just didn't seem to notice or listen because i looked "different". I tried making friends at Year 6, but then YouTube came, which started to ruin children's minds by filling them with "real humour" which involes blood, gore and swearing for COMEDY.

When i enrolled at my secondary school, there were no girls to talk to and everyone was a pain in the butt. One of them started to tease me near the end of Year 7 to Year 11 and it was really annoying. Back in 2010, a new student joined the School and he was purposely stamping on my foot under the table. He got little to no comeuppance and he gave me suicidal thoughts when he started playing music out of nowhere. Thankfully, it ended at the end of Year 10. During my entire time, i only managed to make ONE friend who was timid, but relateable. He got into trouble for doing various things that earned him detentions. I never saw him again. I made another friend, but he was in hospital for Year 8-10 not allowing me to communicate with him. He liked the things I liked, but then he started to hate me for NO REASON during Year 10-11. I never saw him again either.

With my years of pain over, I am finally at Sixth Form College. It was time i made some REAL and more MATURE friends. Most of the friends around me were "eh", but the advanced students were better in attitude, but not taste. When i started to make a friend who was a girl into scary stories and horror movies, she started hated me for NO REASON near the end of my first College Year. She ignored me since then. I finally made one friend at College on my second year, but she didn't seem to take much interest for me. When i looked from the door, she was watching a YouTuber and she LAUGHED. I thought it would be over, but it just HAD TO get worse. I was ashamed so much i wanted to go back and pretend YouTube sensations never happened.

Not saying i hate ALL Youtubers, but the "best" ones i won't mention seem to get all the attention than me when it comes to conversation-starters and comedy. I try to be funny at times, but i have a different sense of humour than the others. Yes, I do use Youtube, but for underrated videos. 

I still wonder what it was like ten years ago before Youtube existed. Famous internet videos were rare back then and it wasn't much of a trend. Not to mention "hashtags". I still think about it every now and then.

I'm not ready for love, but i hope to find someone who I can relate to before "it all closes in". I just hope that someone will be there to comfort me at the saddest of times and give me hope. I know i have you guys, but i want REAL FRIENDS. I still like you all. Yes, i know there's Facebook, but there is PRIVACY ISSUES which i don't even want to talk about.

Thank you for reading. Sorry if that was a little long, but I tend to make long opinions.

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